Oh, and do me a favor. Post a comment with the wisdom the Oracle gave you (and what drink you inputted.) Here's mine:
The Oracle is so wise.Quad Short Americano.
Behold the Oracle's wisdom:
Personality type: Asshat
You carry around philosophy books you haven't read and wear trendy wire-rimmed glasses even though you have perfect vision. You've probably added an accent to your name or changed the pronunciation to seem sophisticated. You hang out in coffee shops because you don't have a job because you got your degree in French Poetry. People who drink quad short americano are notorious for spouting off angry, liberal opinions about issues they don't understand.
Also drinks: Any drink with a foreign name
Can also be found at: The other, locally owned coffee shop you claim to like better
6 comments:
I put my real drink in and it called me some sort of corp-ex snob, so I threw this at it...
iced venti tall grande double shot americano mocha no whip soy with room
and got this...
Personality type: Hippie
In addition to being a hippie, you are a hypochondriac health nut. You secretly think that your insistence on only consuming all-natural products is because you're so intelligent and well-informed; it's actually because you're a sucker. You've dabbled in Wicca or other pseudo-religions that attract morons and have changed your sexual orientation a few times this year. You probably live in California. Everyone who drinks iced venti tall grande double shot americano mocha no whip soy with room should be forced to eat a McDonald's bacon cheeseburger.
Also drinks: Beverages with lots of marketing that says they're herbal and organic
Can also be found at: Whole Foods, indoor rock climbing facilities
It must be the "soy" that tips the hippie off.
I put in "tall soy chai" and got the same Hippie response as Gabe.
When I took out the "soy" and just put "tall chai," it called me a "pseudo-intellectual." My favorite part was when it said, "All people who drink tall chai are potheads."
They are so... so right.
I agree with Soy being a trigger for "Hippie." At first I entered "double short soy latte," which was a common late-morning drink for me during my Starbucks days.
Gabe- I've always known you've got a Hippie life hidden in the closet. Let it out man, let it out. I realize that you are a fraud hippie, though. What was your "real drink?"
Lauren- Maybe we can burn when you get home tonight. That would be a great way to de-stress after a long day. I'll bring the tall Chai's.
this was true. until it said the stripper part.
Personality type: Clueless
venti carmal machiatto
You don't go to Starbucks much; when you do you just tag along with other people since you have nothing better to do. You would like to order a Tazo Chai Crème but don't know how to pronounce it. Most people who drink venti carmel machiatto are strippers.
Also drinks: Wine coolers
Can also be found at: The mall
runner up (venti steamer with shot of vanilla)
Personality type: Ass-clown
You tell people that you're an executive at your company. You think that your repeated references to being "addicted" to caffeine make you seem intriguing and dangerous. People think you're a sucker because you spend 60% of your annual income at Starbucks. Everyone who drinks venti steamed milk shot of vanilla ends up addicted to crack.
Also drinks: Zima
Can also be found at: Karaoke bars
second one's more accurate. well, minus the caffeine addiction. i think i'm the only person in america who doesn't devote my life to "all natural foods" who doesn't have one.
Steve- i didn't remember this until i read your comment, but i had a dream last night that we got really toasted... it was like that show we watched the other day with Val Kilmer? or someone? rolling cigarettes for the girl hostage... or was that on while i was at work?... or was that just another dream?... oh, no.
Ok, I give, it was "Venti Green Tea Frappuchino"
and it gave me the same thing Cuyler got for his 2nd response
but really mine should be more like his first one (minus the stripper, wine cooler and mall parts)
now where'd I put that weed...?
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